Tag: fanfiction

I apologise for being slack

One of the things I prided myself on, when I was writing and posting fanfiction, was that I always replied to reviews. Even if it was a smiley face emoji, I would send something back, or just say thanks.

I loved hearing from people how much they enjoyed the fic (or didn’t). I used to post daily, at about the same time, and some comments from reviewers changed the story, and for the better. I suppose I treated them like beta readers. They gave me ideas for other fics, challenged me to write things to songs or certain pairings or whatever.

It inspired me to keep writing. We were all invested in getting to see the last chapter and ‘the end’.

But then I had my bad tech period, lost my PC, lost my backups, and it was just all bad. And I got out of the habit of replying.

And like a lot of things, it seemed like a huge thing to start again. The pile grew. Where should I start? Should I go back and try to work out which one was the last thing I responded to? Would it look weird to reply now? Like that awful feeling when you ‘like’ a years old Instagram post, you know? [Thanks, ADHD brain.]

This week Ao3 sent a warning that they were experiencing some spam messages, and to check your account, and train it to ID the spam. Off I went to check, and I saw some comments in my in box and before I had really thought about it, I was chatting away to people, and they replied, and I suddenly realised the reviews were nearly a year old. EEK.

But you know what? It didn’t seem to matter.

So I am just going to start where I am. And if people think it’s weird for me to reply now, after all this time? Shrugs.

It’s strange times for us all, right now.

Links:

Fanfiction: https://www.fanfiction.net/~mrstrentreznor

Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrstrentreznor

FictionPad: https://fictionpad.com/author/mrstrentreznor/stories

Thinky Thoughts

I sat down yesterday to answer my fanfic reviews, as I always do. And one just totally derailed me.

It was a bit garbled, but I asked kid 3 to read it and check if I was misinterpreting it.

The reviewer berated me for not adding another single word to the completed one shot they were reviewing. They suggested that other authors gave me enough of an idea to write a one shot; an idea that those authors then didn’t write for fear of being accused of plagiarism.

They suggested that I had lost the trust of authors who no longer used me as a sounding board and that was why I no longer wrote anything. They accused me of having no ideas of my own.

And they finished with ‘just a thought’ which will usually enrage me. [what is it about that phrase that is such a trigger?]

It took me ages to craft a response. I wasn’t rude, or abusive.

But looking at their message again today, they meant to be that rude. They say they are a fan of mine, but I really doubt it. And I don’t need fans like that.

Nanowrimo 2018 – day 24

Daily word count:  883

Total word count:  42,726

Last night I dreamt I was in a library looking for a book called ‘Hurry up and write, and call a cab we’re late’ which is just flat out rude, brain. My ability to be distracted is all your fault!

The weather has been very weird in Australia; we’ve had cold snaps, dust clouds, and storms so windy they’ve shut the airport. And even though I had my flu shot I’ve clearly got cold overnight and I am now barking like a seal. This is my usual cough, don’t worry about it.

It’s a sound so distinctive I once coughed in a crowded noodle bar in Martin Place and someone stood up and shouted out my name. It was a big call given I lived in Indonesia at the time. [Hi Jen *waves*]

Speaking of brains, more ideas for the idea box.

Someone has the job of being an intimacy coordinator. They choreograph sex scenes for movies and plays, like a fight choreographer does a fight. And this is a good thing; no hands in the wrong places, eh?

But imagine…? Imagine what people think they do with that job? It’s like telling people you write erotica and they think you’re trying it out on your partner all the time. Stephen King is not a serial killer is he? I’ve written fanfiction threesomes with werewolves, not HAD a threesome with werewolves. Werewolves don’t exist.

That reminds me, I am SO tempted to ask the person who stole that story why they posted my story as their own. They are still a member of Wattpad but all their works have been removed. I suppose it would be interpreted as abusive, but I really am genuinely interested in how that works for a person; to steal someone else’s work? I mean, the whole thing – word for word. I’ve probably written paragraphs that sound like other people’s work, and hasn’t everyone written ‘he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding’?

Speaking of, I saw a Twitter convo on that sentence being shat upon by everyone as trite. It’s a fear reaction: fight, flight or freeze. So it’s a valid thing for a lot of people, including me.

Links:

Intimacy director

Best Friends share everything – Bella, Embry and Quil

Swan’s mate for Life – Bella, Leah and Paul

 

Inner critic

I follow story coach and writer Jennifer Louden. She’s one of those people who always comes across as enthusiastic and energetic. She’s so positive, you know?

One of her emails this month said she had decided, after four years of effort, to scrap her current memoir.

Four years.

One hundred and twenty thousand words.

She confessed that it was not salvageable.

And I hurt for her. I know how that feels.

Today she had a soundcloud link to her talk about hiding. If I was her, after making that announcement, I’d be hiding. I probably wouldn’t have got out of bed, but here she is still working, still talking, still being positive and still trying to help others.

She asked listeners to write down their responses to their inner critic. She calls it the itty bitty shitty committee. The voice in your head that tells you you’re going to fail. You know the one.

Write down what you should say about yourself in response. So I write: I’m smart, I have three degrees, I’ve done amazing things, I’ve turned unplanned jobs into successes, I made more money for ANZA charity in Jakarta than anyone ever had before, I made speeches, I met ambassadors and world leaders. I’m the #8 reviewer on Goodreads. I have written and posted 78 stories on fanfiction. I have published seven short works that have been downloaded a few times. *runs off to look up stats on Smashwords – 9,130 times. [cool!]*

I write stories that people tell me they like. I have… *runs off to look up ffn stats*

Wait…

WHAT?

I have a total of 12,001,668 hits on ffn.

*jaw drops*

Twelve million?

I should be proud of myself. I AM proud of myself. So why does my inner voice tell me I can’t do this? I already am.

Dammit brain.

 

Links:

Home

https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2154210/Mrstrentreznor

 

3 million hits

 

Back in May 2015 Best Friends Share Everything passed 2 million hits.

http://amgray.blogspot.com.au/2015/05/2-million-hits.html

Now it’s trundled past 3 million.

3m bfse

Well… I am amazed. It just keeps going. An odd pairing (okay triangle), a long story (over 200k), and for relatively minor characters like Embry and Quil. I certainly never expected it to be popular but almost every day I get a review from someone and it says something like: they’ve read it 20 times, or so many times they can’t count it; that the characters were their friends and they miss them.

I know people don’t often comment on older fics and I still respond to all the reviews that allow me to reply. I’m still just astounded.

I adore my three and I’m still struggling with trying to work out what I got right with that story because if I could somehow replicate it in an original work, I’d be golden.

And my total hits are: 11,898,571

And as always, Apologies is right behind it.

The banner was made by GoldenGirl and she even made a receipt with an employee discount as Quil’s mother owns the store.

Comparisonitis

I was talking to someone about me and not getting my work done, and I said ‘I have comparisonitis but I’m not comparing my achievements to other people, I’m comparing my work output to the me of a few years ago.’

I’ll show you. This week I got one of those reviews that make all creators happy.

I’M CRYING I’M GONNA MISS THEM THESE WERE MY FRIENDS OH MY GOD. But seriously this was so beautiful. I love the complexity of the relationship and the smut was *italian chef kissing fingers* but I also love that it was never out of place, they only diddlied when the time was right. Bella and Molly Swan’s similarities in being like “screw the system, I’m gonna do what I want”, also amazing. I LOVE EVERYTHING AND I’M GENUINELY UPSET THAT MY FRIENDS ARE GONE BUT THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR CREATING SUCH AN AMAZING PIECE OF LITERATURE. DEFINITELY MY FAVORITE. I’M GONNA GO MOURN THE LOSS OF MY FRIENDS NOW THANKS.*

How good is that? And I agreed (I always respond to fanfic reviews) that I felt the exact same way. I could not let these characters go because they went together so well, right from the start. They were solid; from day one.

It is for ‘Best friends share Everything’; my most popular fanfiction work. It’s just shy of three million hits. I have often asked myself what I got right about this fic. People tell me all the time, that they love it. And it was a really risky thing: three people, a permanent polyamorous relationship, m/m/f meaning the men have sex with each other as well as with the woman, the men are two secondary characters from the books, those men are rarely written in fanfic, and it covers an entire decade of their life.

At over two hundred thousand words it’s basically two novels.

There is no reason why this should be a popular fic. But it is.

I got something right. And to this day, I don’t know what it was.

Maybe that my love for these characters shone through? I don’t know. (In fact, I’ve asked reviewers what I got right.)

But it was 2012. As I often did, I wrote a quick sexy one shot and posted it on Jan 24, 2012. But people asked me for more. And I couldn’t let these characters go. I finished it Apr 21, 2012. What is that? Twelve or thirteen weeks for 208,077 words.

That’s nuts. I mean, that’s 2,250+ words a day.

And *whispers* that wasn’t the only thing I was writing at the time.

I reread one chapter that the reviewer commented on – I had honestly forgotten what happened in it – and I kept reading. I did one of those ‘hey, this isn’t so bad’ things. I head hopped a little. I noticed a few mistakes. But it was okay. And it was years ago.

I just need to stop choking myself. I published my fanfic and let it go. And I really need to get over choking myself over my original stuff. Good, bad, indifferent… it can’t even be read unless it’s out there.

 

*thank you LovingVillians

Links:

Best friends share everything

I tempted fate, didn’t I?

After writing about my original works appearing on a pirate website, I got a message from a fanfiction reader who asked me why I’d only posted half my story on Wattpad when it was completed on fanfiction.net.

I was confused and asked them which story they meant. I explained that all my stories on Wattpad are complete and that there are only nine of them.*

Best friends Love to Share, they respond.

The what now?

My story is titled Best Friends Share Everything.

So I go look. Yep. There it is. Copied. Even the summary is the same. And the title on the first chapter. I’m more annoyed that they have cut out my reference to tribal gods from the disclaimer. I always say:

the characters and all recognisable situations belong to Stephenie Meyer – this is a work of fan fiction, except for the legends and histories of the Quileute that, of course, belong to them. I pay my respects to their gods.

bfse plagiarism 1

The reader thought it was me. Perhaps she’d asked the Wattpad author the same question and they hadn’t answered her?

So it’s off to the official reporting page I go.

But I just don’t get it. I can get plagiarism at a fiscal level. That’s just basic theft. But how does this work for free works? You post a story that isn’t yours. You get reviews, comments, kudos that are not yours. You have not earned them. How do you feel any real worth from that? If it was me, it would make me double down on the shame.

But I guess that’s it, it wasn’t me.

 

*I found Wattpad a less than easy site to both navigate and post stuff on. It was also hard to get reviews for anything. I haven’t posted on there for a while.

But here’s my page: AM Gray aka mrstrentreznor